The little games

So long i don't even remember how to use the language

Sativa is shaved... she looks silly... like a lion who got half way through a bad buzz cut before she ate the groomer

So once again i am "learning". I think i finally started to recognize that my style of learning is somewhere along the lines of holding this new blanket of information at arms length, a cringe on my face, waiting on the slow track as it seeps into my pores. Never been comfortable diving with my eyes open.

Back to basics. Same mistakes, new players.

I know you're there and only to spite my own face do i bluntly ignore you.

At peace with this silence.... well, silence filled with inanimate comfort and noice; but at least im not scared of the front door anymore.

"Inside" appears to be working out. Outside, on the other hand, is still a shift in gears to high alert status. Eyes wide open, senses maxed; very tiring.

I never liked keeping things constantly clean because i always took pleasure in the contrast; joy from the act of cleaning something and seeing the change of what it was to what it became.

The other day, in a room full of 15 people, i sat among them and, as if it were any normal-day activity, we proceeded to spit into test tubes until they were about 2 finger widths full. We then spun down our spit, boiled it, and prepared it to be frozen.

I know i am on the right career path when i find this act hilarious, and (totally unrelated) the thought of chasing a locker thief down the hall with a culture of Shigella makes me want to roll around on the floor laughing....

.... just saying :D

Ta-ta-Ma-Lee-Va

In the event of a disaster;
tornado, fire, break-in, bird flu epidemic...the next ice age...
the one and only thing that i could not live without...
the thing that i would absolutely need to take with me,
and that i would go back for,
whatever the cost:

Is Sativa.

I know a lot of people who wouldn't understand that.
It's a mixture of love and responsibility

(and let me tell you it would honestly take me a LONG time to get over not being able to save my fish and if there was time and the means, they would be number two on my list. I wouldn't have to save my roommate because he'd already be outside, with a big sheepish grin)

anyways, it's more than that.
Having the privilege of taking care of an animal has given me so much;
it's a source of that rarely found thing: unconditional love
it's been humor, company, crazy energy spurts and tons of attitude.

We're not talking right now though.
Because she left safety of the backyard,
gave me five mini-freak-out-attacks,
and when i finally found her,
she was in the front near a busy street
three doors down,
on the neighbours porch.

Way too friendly to be an outdoor cat.